The New Computer for Blogophilia 14.4



A week ago  I bought a netbook computer. It occurred to me just recently that I “needed” it.. In the past year I’ve come quite addicted to writing and maintaining contact with my writer friends. We would be traveling over the summer and it would be much easier if I had my own computer and avoid line ups at hotel computers– and to be able to write on my time schedule.

I also felt left out as most people I know own a laptop. Myke even grills with his laptop near by. Chris naturally has one as he is a government employee. And I am sure Jay has one so that he can keep in touch while running from dogs on his postal route.

I’m tired of dreaming about being able to read my scribbled thoughts when I get home. If I could write them on a computer I might not understand them, but at least I would be able to read them.

Now just so you know, it’s not like I am  technologically illiterate. My desktop at home is in good running order. My techie has taught me how to troubleshoot. I can find my way around most computers comfortably and just that morning in my peer learning class I assisted a classmate in accessing her power point presentation. I want that to be very clear.

The purchasing process started well enough. I walked into the store, marched over to the computer section and sought a costumer service person to help me find what I wanted. What I “needed”.

The nice young man led me to the Netbook section. After inquiring about price, he led me to another section–items on sale. Consulting my list (I’m a compulsive list maker), I ascertained  the threeUSBports, that it works on a rechargeable  battery, that I would have to install Word myself from my disks at home and that, yes indeedy, games were included.

As I checked off my list, I inquired about the monitor. If I am to get a netbook I would want to use it outdoors, possibly in the sun (so I could still fuel my addiction and be in the fresh air at the same time). I asked if the monitor was ‘anti-glare’. No, the nice young man replied. Do you have any that are? I asked. Yes, and we walked around to the first section where we started. These are anti- glare but a bit more expensive. That’s OK. It wasn’t that much more and knowing the problem I have with my camera, I felt it worth a few extra dollars to avoid the nonsense I go through with that device

A sunny day at the beach, or a sunny day in the snow finds me squinting into the screen and pointing and praying I will get something decent. Oh, yeah I’ve tried all sorts of gizmos to cut down the camera glare. None worked.

My next question had to do with internet access. My techie had told me about a “stick” that you get from one of the cell phone providers that allows internet access whether or not you are in the vicinity of WI-FI. The “stick” works off cell phone towers thereby granting access just about anyplace you may be.

With new computer in hand, it really is quite light weight–we strolled to the “stick” people. Very convenient– they are right there in the same store. Well, let me tell you, it is not cheap! I pondered for a bit then the other young fella happened to mention that the “sticks” are unusable in theUS. Duh? One reason I want it is so that when visiting dad (he’s 97) inNew YorkI can have my own computer and not use his. He is so picky about his computer that we always wind up arguing. He is addicted to Bridge on line and plays with several ladies around the world.

That was the clincher. Nope. Don’t need a “stick” if can’t use it in the U.S.

With that bit of information, I picked up a new jump drive (they no longer make 2GB, smallest is 4) and headed to check out.

On my way home I realised I had forgotten something: a wireless mouse. Oh well I would go back another time–not realising how soon that time would come..

Arriving home, I opened the box. So far so good. I knew from past experience with cameras and cell phones that the new device would have to be charged before I could use it where ever I wished to use it.

OK, so found the charger and what appeared to be another cord that went into the charger. Fine, I could handle that. Another package contained a third gizmo. I looked, examined it, pondered and realised it had to be the battery. Hmmm fine. Written instructions with graphics are no longer included with new electronics, so I was at a loss for assistance. And, to boot, I’m generally a klutz. I could see the spot where the battery attaches to the machine, and I pulled it this way, and turned it that way, scratched my head, turned it around, turned it front to back and reversed it and scratched my head again (it didn’t help).

Finally out of frustration, I called the store. Portable phone in one hand, computer in the other, I asked my question. You should know this all took place in the downstairs bathroom as that room has the most convenient outlet. I charge my cell phone there too. The portable  phone is not large enough to put between my ear and shoulder so I had to put it on the washing machine while talking to the nice young man on the other end of the line. (The washroom is also the laundry room). First I said: “How do I turn the dammed thing on?” I knew enough to know I should be able to turn it on as long as it is plugged into the wall. I had tried of course. I hit some buttons, and poked around. It stayed dead. The nice yung man said at the front of the keyboard I would find a button that would slide to turn the machine on. Well actually, I knew it was a slide thingy as the manual, such as it is, did mention that.

I used the same method as one would with a car that won’t start. Buttons pushed, levers pulled, pedals pressed. Push, pull, press–it sounds like an exercise, or something.

As soon as he said “front” I stopped him right there to clarify. My husband calls the “front”, “back”, and the “back”, “front”  I am well aware of the language barrier. We found a common starting point and I called it down not front. He said I would find a button with a line through it. Sure I would. Finally he said just come into the store and they would show me how to turn it on. Yep, I felt dumb. Well I had to go back for the mouse anyway. So off I went. Into the store I marched again. Found another young man and explained my problem. Well faster than spit he had that sucker of a battery slid into where it’s supposed to go. I glared. Then he took the machine and plugged it in and turned it on. Just like that! Where? Where? Where is the button to turn it on?

It’s right on the curve of the dammed thing – UNDERNEATH – not “front”, not ”up”, not “down” but underneath!

Okey Dokey. He also assured me that an icon would appear to tell me how far along the charge was and he said I  would know when it was fully charged. I was skeptical but took his word for that.

We glided over to the mouse section and I picked out a mouse. Paid for said mouse and went home, again. Hopefully my techie will show me how it works. The mouse didn’t squeal for me. It seemed dead.

Back in the bathroom, computer plugged in, battery attached. I turned it on! Yea!

Instead of an icon or a desktop it decided to load settings. Whoopy. Now remember my mouse is not yet attached so had to use the mouse pad thingy on the keyboard. Yeah right. Not an easy task for a klutz. I thought, well if get through the set up maybe then I will see an icon or a desktop.

At one point the icon did show up, by the way.

A million and three  years later I said the hell with it, left it plugged in and walked away. I’ll know it’s charged if I can use it when it’s not plugged in.

I simply gave up. I still couldn’t turn it off.



Written for

Blogophilia 14.4 Topic: “I’m Tired of Dreaming

Bonus Points:

(Hard, 2pts): include the names of 3 Blogophiliacs

(Easy, 1pt): include a car that won’t start



This entry was posted in Blogophilia, Writing and tagged , . Bookmark the permalink.

47 Responses to The New Computer for Blogophilia 14.4

  1. LOL, love the pics…

  2. Liam says:

    LMAO!!!! oh this is priceless! i just wanna hug u

  3. Irene Melgoza says:

    Where do you turn it on? LOL That sounds like me the first time I ever wanted to turn on an Apple computer at work.

    This was fun to read! : )

  4. LOL, Sue. I completely understand. I too just got my first laptop. Oh…I had all kinds of reasons why I should get one. You are braver than me. I paid them to add my programs that I needed for a secure system. My theory is that I had no idea how to even turn it on, so how could I load programs. My desktop has Vista. The laptop has Win7. I didn’t know what kind of trouble I would run into, so I paid them to set it up. Now I’m getting used to it, I am sure I could have done it, but…you know… hahaha,

    I loved this piece. You had me in stitches!

    • sassyspeaks says:

      Darlene! so good to see you! I am pretty good with computers but this one is a puzzle will have to try and use it more. Glad for the stitches, guess my humour writing class is paying off 😀

  5. Sallon says:

    If it weren’t for my kids I wouldn’t know what to do either!

  6. Gerard says:

    Oh this is too funny! Wasn’t technology suppose to make our lives easier?

  7. bluerose says:

    I’m laughing so hard that I’m crying! Apparently, if you don’t buy a new computer every six months or so, all your hard earned knowledge and expertise becomes obsolete.

    I just went through the same thing a few months ago with my pc, right down to the mouse not working. No mouse, no keyboard, no desktop. I packed up the entire thing, moniter and all, drove all the way back to the store, and demanded one that worked. Turns out the software needed a “million and three years” to be updated. I guess it was trying to update, and I was supposed to wait for it to finish. I didn’t see that in the instructions. Like you, I couldn’t find any instructions, or even graphics showing where everything plugged in.

    I carried it back to that store 2 times. Threatened to build a bon fire in the parking lot to offer it up as a burnt sacrifice to the sadistic computer gods. After that, I called the store manager directly, REPEATEDLY, until we got it running. I feel your pain!

  8. Another Government Employee says:

    I don’t have a laptop. I’m chained to my desktop.

    Now, my son’s have had problems with theirs.

  9. tyler says:

    LOL – I’d have been on the phone to my daughter long before the store. She knows I’m a luddite and doesn’t laugh – at least not when I’m talking to her

  10. Oh boy! I can relate…. It’s always something with computers, isn’t it? My laptop crashed in January, got a Mac laptop and there was a learning curve for me! Then when my desktop was about to crash we got another Mac. This time I hired one of the guys to come in and migrate massive files. He taught me a few tricks.

    As for the scroll/thingy on laptops, I’ve never mastered it… I need that wireless mouse. Hope everything comes together for you Sue!!! 😀

  11. Leta says:

    Wow! There’s wireless mouse now? I need to get that. I’ve got an old antiquated laptop that I fight with every day since I’ve been here visiting my daughter. I take my laptop everywhere with me, especially when I travel. Something went wrong with it the other night, so I called my nephew (the computer guru) and he says it’s time to get a new one… haha!

    I so feel your frustrations. Hope it all works out quick for you. 😀

  12. MARVIN MARTIAN says:

    That’s why I have Commander K. He’s brilliant with these &*^%$ gadgets. 8 points, Earthling!! 😀

  13. Jay Sole says:

    Sue, this was funny…and relatable! I’m not up on all the latest gadgets either. I have the latest IPod, because that’s my most important techie toy….it keeps me company as I deliver mail everyday! But when it comes to computers….nope! Don’t have a laptop! I have a desk top and I couldn’t even tell you how old it is! I think it’s at least 5 years old! Your a step ahead of me! Cute post!

  14. LMAO!!!!!! Oh! This killed me! Sounds like a jolly big mess, for sure! hahahaha! Okay, sounds kind of like me with new gizmos. Luckily the hubby has a gene that makes all electronics easy, so I always give him new things and then let him show me how to do it later.

    • sassyspeaks says:

      I haven’t picked it up in a week – must do – Barry my techie is wonderful. Been doing my homework and it literaly makes me laugh so hard I fall on the floor – hope teacher likes it as much !

  15. Lindsay says:

    To turn the Netbook on is easy-just read the directions.

  16. crazypjs says:

    Sue this sounds like a day in my life. I do fine for the most part but when getting some new gizmo or other and it’s all Greek to me, I seem to be lacking in the geek gene.

    • sassyspeaks says:

      Well I have the geek gene but when I have to learn something new and don’t get it immediately I become frustrated. So more sessions with my techie and it should all work out. Nice to see you this week 😀

  17. DJ Myke says:

    Would you believe, I am reading this in the bathroom? (just kidding)

    My laptop comes courtesy of my job. They did not give it to me because they like me. They just gave me more tasks, and took said tasks off others. That was a fair trade. When I got into using it, all the bells and whistles worked, and I was having a fine time with it, right up until I actually went to use it for company purposes, and was putting in an order, with a firm deadline… Seems I did not know how to process the order, and send it to dispatch. So, I had to send an e-mail to the dispatcher, explaining the who, what, when and where.

    Shortly after, I got a respose, asking me why? Why did I not do that myself, as was intended? Can’t tell you how embarrassing that was for me.

    Glad you have what you need, and want here. You are the consummate creative writer, you know, as evidenced here. No one else I know could tell this story, and have me hanging on your every word.

    How do the smiley faces work over here, anyway. Like this, maybe? 🙂

    • sassyspeaks says:

      yes that would be embarrassing

      that compliment coming from you tell me that yes indeedy I am a “writer” and to carry on with what I’ve come to love – my muse is in overdrive at the moment and just hope it can keep up with Marvin’s prompts. I really appreciate that – and I probably blushed when I read it

      smile faces 😀 🙂

      • DJ Myke says:

        When comes the time for harvest, gather all you can. You can rest when the fields are barren… You probably won’t rest, but you could without having anyone look over their glasses at you.

        Pear with me. I really have produce on the mind this weekend. Seriously. I am eating a watermelon right now.

  18. Spirit Free says:

    Oh my technology is a pain at times…great post…

  19. joaniethewriter says:

    Whichever computer you are using, I am glad to see your post this week! You had me chuckling! I can relate to this. Hope all works out for you!

  20. BarbaraK aka fiddlbarb says:

    Congratulations on the new computer. Awesome Blogophilia 14.4! ~barb k~

  21. I so chuckled as i read this.I am far worse than you with them and I still don’t have a laptop~ LOL, thanks for the evening chuckle. HUgs

Aw come on say something....

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s