Six Sentence Sunday July 31

Yea! It’s Sunday and time for Six Sentence Sunday

Every week participants post six sentences from something they are writing – or have written. It’s a lot of fun and really a great way to meet new writers! And I’ve met some terrific people. Thank you !

Be sure to check out the other great participants and thanks so much for stopping by!

Carrying on with my set of stories which start in the 50s. Six teens, seemingly very different, meet weekly and keep in touch with each other their entire lives. They must have something in common.

This  week we meet Gene. This clip takes place away from the group. I’m not sure how much time they will spend in Nates Deli together. Since I can  do only six sentences, I’ll just have to see what the kids want to do. Each character starts with a line or two of a glimpse into their home life as they  leave to meet with friends.

“I’m going out,” he muttered.

 His father’s scornful voice replied, “Of course you are,” and looked at his son with disappointed eyes.

The bowling alley’s  smells of: old shoes, stale popcorn , warm beer and sweat mingled with  the sounds of: falling pins, laughing people and music, afforded him an escape from his father’s ambiguous fears.  

“Hi Gene,” Lila said, over her shoulder as she  headed over to her group of friends.

 Her big grin and flirty  eyes covered Gene’s lustrous   brown hair and muscular body. “Hi Lila,” he replied, but his eyes were stuck on Ted’s strong back as  his friend rolled  the ball in the next alley.













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46 Responses to Six Sentence Sunday July 31

  1. Gem Sivad says:

    Hmmm, I think I’m getting the problem. His attraction to Ted is well done and tells a lot about his internal conflict! Great six!

  2. Great capture of how a bowling alley smells 🙂

  3. lizculver says:

    Love the description of the bowling alley but most of all love the subtlety with which you connect Gene with Ted. Nice six.

  4. jennajaxon says:

    What Liz said! Great subtlety. And I’m intrigued to know about Gene’s dad’s “ambiguous” fears and if they play heavily into Gene’s character. Excellent six!

  5. Alix says:

    Fantastic description. Great six! Thank you.

  6. Zee Monodee says:

    Gene sounds like a tortured soul! Well done

  7. epbeaumont says:

    Triangle, I see. Good times ahead (well, for the readers, not for the characters).

  8. Well, that definitely describes a bowling alley. 🙂 Great introduction to the conflict as well!

  9. Very vivid six! I spent loads of time in bowling allies, and your description is dead on accurate!

  10. you really managed to pack a lot into your six! I especially liked the father’s “disappointed eyes” 🙂

    …I did find the colons tripped me up a bit though 🙂

  11. Bree Younger says:

    Oh, wow! I’m beginning to see where this is headed. Great six!

  12. Lindsay says:

    Looks like there might be a bit of conflict brewing here

  13. Nice atmosphere. But you stop at the good part! 😉 Nice six

  14. Oh – so much angst and trouble brewing – great six!

  15. Gayle Ramage says:

    Methinks there may be a love-triangle brewing. Great that the story starts off in the 50s!

  16. J.C. Martin says:

    I’m enjoying these glimpses into each individual’s lives. Don’t think the colons (:) are needed in the bowling alley para though.

    Thanks for your comment on my blog–speak to you when I get back! 🙂

  17. Marie Dees says:

    Great six. You really bring out the description!

  18. Lynne Murray says:

    An intriguing situation, particularly in the 1950s when the whole concept of men desiring men was very much below the radar! Fascinating conflict brewing!

    • sassyspeaks says:

      Yes so true – but that does not mean it did not exist. Remember all these characters start in the 50s and I will up date them – sure I will 😀 Thanks very much for the comment

  19. I felt I was right there with them in the bowling alley. Gene better be very careful. In those days they’d just take him out back and beat the hell out of him, if they found out about his feelings for Ted. Scary times.

  20. bluerose says:

    yes, you say a lot in these 6 sentences. excellent job!

  21. Very well described, the two contrasting places stood out well!

  22. ooh! now there’s a relationship conflict >:) Nice!!

  23. Gemma Parkes says:

    Great description, loved it!

  24. Pingback: Six Sentence Sunday November 13 « sassyspeaks

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