If you’re like me, then you love practicing auditory voyeurism*: listening in on other people’s conversations and with cell phones that is so easy as the people on the phone don’t know or care that they are overheard. And then I like to guess who these people are and their relationships.
* eavesdropping – the term was made up by a friend on My Space.
Recently when dining in a local restaurant, one of my companions and I got into an argument. As the woman next to our table was leaving she admitted to me that she had been listening to us—how could she not have heard our loud voices? And made a comment about the book we had been discussing. I’ve never experienced that before and while I certainly indulge in eavesdropping, I certainly wouldn’t admit it!
When I took the humour writing course last spring the teacher told us to listen in to conversations as some pretty funny material can be heard that way. He sure was correct!
So here is the scene – a restaurant – and overheard snippets of conversation. But I will also tell you the people involved and the context. Because I’m nice that way :D.
The walls can hear you, they have ears.
This from the mousey looking woman at the table to my left. Her companion was a good looking, well dressed man. They are husband and wife, and for the most part don’t speak to each other. Very married.
The remark was made in reference to one of her patients. She’s psychiatrist.
The play was an original production based on a mishmash of Kafka themes, kind of like a painting where some see symbolism and metaphors in the splash and dabs of paint.
This from one of the gentlemen to the right of me. For the most part, I couldn’t hear their conversation. They were both good looking men. The one who spoke had a small, neatly trimmed beard and an accent I couldn’t place. He also wore a red beret—indoors, the waiter kept frowning at him. The only thing I was able to catch from the other fellow was “Vote Tyler” which made no sense. Though that may have been his name and he called his friend David II. Perhaps to distinguish himself from another person named Dave? I don’t know. At any rate they were speaking about a play they had just seen. But I also caught the names of Clint Eastwood and Charlie Sheen, so I was very confused. Which is one of the problems with just hearing snippets of their exchange. They both seemed pretty serious and didn’t laugh much.
At the table behind me sat a beautiful couple, obviously very much in love. They didn’t stop speaking to each other and occasionally one or both of them burst out into loud giggles (her), long deep chortles (him) or laughter (both).
The words I heard here made no sense whatsoever. Be My Lover, Call it Evil and Go to Hell.
And now through the magic of Blogophila you will learn who they are and what they were speaking about. As I said, I’m nice like that 🙂
He’s an agent of the Devil (fondly called Mr. D) and she, his mistress. Hence the Be my Lover from him to her.
She was concerned that her friends would call it evil, her dating such a man.
And he warned her that she could go to hell if Mr. D so ordered it. He just wanted her to be clear about the risks she was taking by being with him.
Well I wish them the best of luck.
See you really have no idea who your fellow diners might be.
Blogophilia 27.4 Topic: “The Walls Have Ears”
Bonus Points:(Hard, 2pts): use a phrase from one of David II’s blogs
(Easy, 1pt): use an Alice Cooper song title
used three Be My Lover, Call it Evil and Go to Hell