4th Writers’ Platform-Building Campaign: 1st Campaigner Challenge


1st Campaigner Challenge: Writers' Platform-Building Campaign

I decided to participate in this challenge. Why?  Because sometimes I cannot resist. 😀

 

The challenge: write a short story in any format, in 200 words or less, that begin with the words “Shadows crept across the wall…”. For an added challenge, you could:

  • end the story with the words “everything faded.”
  • include the word “orange” in the story.
  • write in the same genre you normally write
  • make your story 200 words exactly!

So here’s what I came up with, and I managed to satisfy all four extra criteria, too! 😀

 Click here for the list of entrants and links to all entries for this Challenge. Don’t forget to vote for your favourite by clicking the “Like” button!

ESCAPE

Shadows crept across the wall as the men moved above. The sun’s angle transformed their shadows into dancing marionettes. 

 “Do you see anything down there?”

“Nothing stirring in the trench.”

I crouched into a corner. Granddad had told us stories about life in the army fox-holes.  Don’t think he meant this kind of trench though. The jolt of adrenalin that shot through my body when I hid in the laundry cart and then wheeled out to the truck had started to wear off. The driver would take me only to the gates, no further.    

 “Well look again.”

I heard their boots crunching on the gravel.  So close.  Too close.

I tried to blend into the dirt as the guards leaned over the precipice. The shadows shape-shifted as their position changed.  I knew my orange jumpsuit would stand out if they looked in the right direction. My hands felt clammy. My tongue tasted of salt. I could smell my fear.  I willed myself invisible.

 “Oh, wait I see him now.”

I guess that was damn Mac again. They stood right above my head. I heard the clicks of the rifle’s trigger as Mac perfected his aim. The shadows evaporated. Everything faded.

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53 Responses to 4th Writers’ Platform-Building Campaign: 1st Campaigner Challenge

  1. Ooh very scary!! You had me on the edge of my seat the entire time! Great job!

    I’m entry #19

  2. I agree with Jess, scary and suspenseful! 🙂

    I’m #37 🙂

  3. siv maria says:

    Nice use of the challenge words and the line, “I could smell my own fear” well done!

  4. Yikes! Did he get shot? I wanna know what happened!! Great entry!!

    #96

  5. Ann Cory says:

    Nice job with the suspense and build-up! 🙂

  6. J.C. Martin says:

    Nice! Love the imagery of the shadows as dancing marionettes!

  7. Nick Wilford says:

    Very suspenseful – cliche but I felt like I was there. Takes talent to create this feeling in such a short space. Great job!

  8. Daisy Carter says:

    Nice job – the imagery especially is great!

  9. Great job! I’m having a blast reading all of these. I’m at the end. #111.

  10. Lady Gwen says:

    So close to escape! Great writing, well done:)

  11. Komal says:

    Very well written! This was full of suspense and it really worked for me. Great job!

  12. fairview says:

    i liked the way you built the tension. the imagery of shadows turning ontp dancing marionettes was nice too

  13. Rek says:

    It was a tense scenario all the way through…kudos for managing such an effective piece.

  14. Great build up of tension and lots of good imagery! Great entry! 🙂

  15. beylit says:

    Very nicely done.

  16. Really interesting! I like your flow between sentences.

  17. Oh! So sad! Great imagery, and I especially love the short aside about his grandfather.

  18. I, too, like the ‘dancing marionettes’ line. Loved the tension in the scene, as well. Great job!

  19. I’m having a great time reading all of the entries. Yours is the first association of the color orange with a prison jumpsuit — GREAT!

    Laurie Buchanan, entry #92

  20. Ashley Nixon says:

    Very awesome! I was totally hoping the guy would escape!

  21. Christy Farmer says:

    He is so close to his escape! Nice job! I’m # 61.

  22. I’m here to let you know you’ve been chosen to move on to the second round! Congratulations! 🙂

  23. Talk about a harsh punishment.

    I’m number #109.

  24. Ooh, very tense and sad. Thanks for joining in the challenge!

    You’ve been tagged at the Kelworth Files! Check it out and see my questions for you to answer – http://kelworthfiles.wordpress.com/2012/02/25/the-joy-of-being-tagged-and-tagging/

  25. Almost…there…ooops…Mac…darn him

    Tale Spinning #58

  26. Nice! Love the ending 😀

  27. Oooh! I liked this! Very good, Sue 🙂

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