In the murky gloom of the tenement,
I crouch in the mud shade of life,
on the margins; out of sight, out of mind.
Huddled in my corner of existence.
Surrounded by meager possessions,
for comfort; my home.
Reaching out, I touch my bags and boxes.
My “stuff”; reassured that they exit,
that I exist.
The shade sounds
are the silence of perceived failures.
Failures not deliberate, but
simply due to happenstance.
The alley reeks of a life not well lived.
I see you walking by,
in the sunlight of your superiority,
with your looks of scorn,
as if you never disappeared
down the path of despair.
You think I’m a bum
with my unkempt clothes,
dull eyes filled with hunger
and tinge of a stink.
Just an emaciated, raggedy shape in the corner.
As invisible as another piece of
dirty back street refuse.
You think I have no education,
just another ignorant derelict.
I had a life like yours:
The accident was bad,
could not work,
could not pull my weight.
The pain pills helped.
Then became necessary,
even when the pain was gone.
took the kids,
lost the house,
out on the streets.
The mission was chaos.
So here I sit;
watching you walk on by,
in the sun of a life well lived,
blind to my existence in the shadows.
Where coldness hovers in the shade
emitting a chill straight to the soul.
This is my story.
It could happen to you.
Should you lose yourself
in the shadows of the alley.
Last week colleen spoke of giving back to the disenfranchised especially at this time of year.
We all dream. Every one of us. The fear is that our dreams will turn into nightmares. When life doesn’t go the way we dream that’s when the state of widdendream enters the picture, resulting in even worse choices. One requires the stone face of a gargoyle to shovel past the pigeon poop and allow our dreams to shine.
***written for Blogophilia 40.6 Topic – A Dream and a Fear
(Hard, 2 pts) Use a Widdendream – confusioin mental distrubance – mad fit fury
(Easy, 1 pt) Include a gargoyle and a pigeon